Why Are We So Angry?

My brother recently sent me an awesome slide show titled Tips that may bring you a beautiful life- there were a number of "tips" that really struck me in the elegance and simplicity of their message, but one that especially spoke to me was " life is too short to waste time hating anyone" another equally profound and difficult for me was "make peace with your past so it doesn't mess up your present".

I read a lot. I will admit that aspire to one day be a positive force for change and a "lighthouse" for showing people a different way to interact with one another, especially in the workplace. As an "aspiring" writer and change agent people who can craft important messages with words, art or music humble me and make me wistful.

Some of what I read these days causes me to posit my question. I have read things ranging from Tiger Woods performance as a golfer to Michelle Obama's decision to wear shorts on a journey to trek the Grand Canyon and the solutions suggested by the CEO of Whole Foods to a less invasive way to deal with the health care crisis. The point isn't that people have strong differing opinions, it is the vehemence and the anger I see reflected in the words they choose and the personalization. Can't we disagree without demonizing?

Ted Kennedy's death has "officially" ended the Camelot era. I can't say that I agreed with his political positions terribly often and I am old enough to remember some of the more "colorful" episodes in his life. I do think that he contributed to many things that many of us have benefited from and and that he truly earned his mantle as "the great lion of liberalism".

I don't live in a surreal world. I have personally felt the effects of our current economy and no many others that have as well. I can't say that I blame any particular individual or party for where we are. I feel there has been plenty of "contributory negligence" on the part of many people including individual American consumers.

I mentioned in a previous blog that I am concerned that as the financial markets improve we declare the recession over! I still hope that we learned some things. A recovery that doesn't include much higher employment rates, the foundation of some solutions to the health care issues we face, and some means of dealing with the anxiety faced by many families seems a little empty to me. Maybe I am just feeling melancholy as summer begins to wind down, but I don't think so.

It seems to me that right after 9/11 we were angry, but we were also resolved and willing to put aside some of our differences and stand together. When we band together only in anger I get concerned. I have seen that movie- in Germany, in Palestine, and in other parts of the world. I don't like the way the movie turned out.

So I guess I will leave you with another "quote" from my brother's slide show-" Live your life with the 3 E's -Energy, Enthusiasm, and empathy and the 3 F's- Faith, Family, and Friends". I don't know about you, but I think that sounds way better than anger.........

The Power Of Relationships

As you all know I agree with Margaret Wheatley that the most important influence in organizations is relationships; not systems, not technology, but relationships.

I had the occasion to join a friend last evening with a friend and colleague of his I hadn't previously met. I found his friend to be charming, personable and very articulate. As our discussion turned to the inevitable " so what business are you in", he said that he worked for an organization that distributes a pharmaceutical type of product that is manufactured in Europe. What was especially interesting was that he shared their "distribution" network was almost exclusively based on relationship selling; no large sales force , no "cold calling". It is based on trust and referral.

A week or so ago I mentioned an article by Jeffrey Pfeffer of Stanford. He opined that much of the issue with health care in the United States is in many ways relationship based; most Americans rely on their employer for health care and for economic security. Compared to other countries our "safety net" is pretty small. He talked about the effects of stress about their employment and the accompanying systems like health care tied to employment and the direct correlation to health care issues. I agree with him.

I read some articles and listened to a couple of "idea casts" on BNET this week that illustrated the same thing from a different angle- the relationship between employees and leaders and how in these times especially employees watch their leaders for any sign of positive or negative events or signs. They do that normally, but in these times it is exacerbated to the nth degree. Marcus Buckingham says the most important attribute of leadership is clarity- people want to believe their leaders have a vision.

My own personal research validates information published by Peppers and Rogers, BlessingWhite, Gallup, and others about the power of engagement. I am talking about true engagement which includes customer, employee, shareholder, and stakeholder. Organization's with high engagement outperform their competitors consistently and by an order of magnitude. Engagement is about relationships.

I have written and spoken a lot lately about social networks and their increasing importance in communications strategy. I believe that social networking is about relationships.

I have also written and spoken about the "social contract". In historical times the poor were tied to the wealthy. They literally "belonged" to the property or estate for hundreds of years. The American "experiment" was all about eliminating that. You could come here and reinvent yourself.
You could homestead a piece of property of start a business. Then we ran out of frontier. Consistent with the rest of the world the Industrial revolution occurred. We exchanged the value of personal competence for the promise of "security" in return for "obedience" The power of the great capitalist was tempered only by the labor movement. That was about relationships,
however dysfunctional.

The "world" economy changed that social contract. American industry was not always dominant, our quality suffered and correspondingly so did our market share. Interestingly much of the "new" management models like lean manufacturing and TQM have very strong relationship components to them. U.S. companies retreated from economic security in return for "loyalty". Traditional pension plans are almost obsolete. The parental relationship between employers and employed relative to health care is in crisis mode. Our health care model is parental. We don't address root causes of costs, we shift them around. People don't want to share responsibility for their health or the costs of treating them. That is a relationship, although another dysfunctional one.

I am not suggesting that a "parental" model is appropriate. Anybody that has ever heard me speak, worked with me, or read any of my writing knows better. I rather like the concept of "personal competence" and relationships founded on mutual respect and honesty between employer and employed, taxpayer and government, supplier and customer, and individuals. A relationship based on respect, information, and mutual responsibility and built on a foundation of trust. Maybe I am just nostalgic or misguided, but I think that is what the Founding Fathers meant so many years ago when they formed this country.

Tomorrow is Independence Day, maybe a good day to reflect on what they meant and the critical relationships in each of our lives. I think that is what I'll do, how about you?

Thoughts for Thanksgiving

For those of us in the U.S. today is Thanksgiving. Originally a day to recognize the first significant harvest of the "Pilgrims" landing in New England in many ways it has become lost as a commercial holiday- the day before "black Friday", the largest single retail day in U.S. marketing.
I would like to think of it more traditionally, as a day of reflection, of what we all have to be thankful for in our lives.
In our family every other year my wife's family gathers at our home. Although my parents have both passed away I get some vicarious pleasure from seeing the joy that comes from my Father in law as he gets to see his children and grandchildren assembled in one place.
My children will be joining us as well. At 18 and 22 they aren't children any more. Soon they will have their own families and their own traditions.
2008 has been an interesting year so far. I have returned to consulting after almost a seven year hiatus. I took the time to write the book I have always threatened to write. With the support of family and friends and the kind editing and gracious endorsement of my work I am preparing to formally publish it soon.
We saw a historic event in 2008. A woman and an African American competed for the nomination of a major party. The African American prevailed not only in winning the nomination of his party, but being elected as the President of the United States.
I like to think that pioneers like Abraham Lincoln, the Kennedy brothers, Dr. Martin Luther King and others who fought so hard for so long can look now and see that meaningful change is possible and that their sacrifices were not in vain.
We face on the deepest recessions that this country and perhaps the world has seen in generations, but there also seems to be a dawning recognition that we live in a world economy, not a local economy anymore. Perhaps we can use this as a catalyst moving forward to truly make meaningful changes on multiple levels.
This year has been challenging for me, but I see it as a new beginning and a platform for the future. We will each make a choice as to whether we move forward or backward.
I have much to be thankful for today. I hope you do too!