A Case for Civility

I spend some time discussing a lot of different issues with people. I like to think of myself as reasonably open minded and tolerant, perhaps erroneously. I actually posted a question on LinkedIn a few months about anger and got some interesting reactions.

This last week has provided several interesting illustrations for me about the anger and energy that is out there.

The first are the comments and vehemence of reactions to President Obama being awarded the Nobel peace prize. Although a lot of the reaction has been that it represents a non event or that it has been awarded prematurely if not inappropriately other reactions have been angry and frankly nasty.

I responded to a poll on LinkedIn indicating my thoughts, the award was premature, but that being an optimist I was hoping perhaps it was awarded proactively as a catalyst and got back a response telling me how wrong I was. When I responded that I hadn't actually endorsed it the person wrote me back again telling me I was wrong for not being more strident in my denunciation of all things Obama.

If you really want to see an exercise in venom , my second example involves the blogs/comment streams regarding various sportscasters predictions and comments about everything ranging from college football to professional golf. It is some nasty stuff.

I read earlier this week about a Delaware school districts decision to transfer a six year old to reform school for six months because he brought an eating utensil to school. The utensil includes a blade which makes it a weapon under the school's zero tolerance policy. In the interests of "consistency" and the concern about perceived potential racial bias the policy does not take into consideration the circumstances, academic record of the student, etc. As you might suspect I think this policy is not well conceived or administered. I wonder if the folks who crafted it are available for further consultation on the Le Garrett Blount incident (sarcasm intended).

What was really striking was the comment stream initially directed at the school district, but then involving the parents, racial profiling, and even managed to blame President Obama for this one.

Several felt that the mother is criminally negligent and should be incarcerated for as a substitute for her child's suspension, others accused people of protesting the punishment of being racially biased, comparing the issue to a child who brought a handgun to school and killed a classmate. Quickly the discourse devolved into name calling aimed at each other and incorporating the right to bear arms, etc. Pretty nasty.

Perhaps I am overly tolerant of others viewpoints. Has "social media" eliminated all the rules? Have we lost our ability to "agree to disagree". Do we need laws and "policies" to "explain" to us what appropriate dialogue is with each other.

The school's defense of their policy was "consistency". Those of you who know me recognize this is one of my least favorite words because in our new vernacular it means I don't have to use judgement as long as I follow "policy".

I will freely admit to being opinionated, intense, and maybe even at times overbearing and appearing arrogant. I strive for and will continue to be civil.

Is it just me or have we become desensitized to civility kind of like sex and violence? Your thoughts appreciated.

Where Were You When The World Stopped Turning

Alan Jackson, the great country singer included those lyrics in his beautiful song about 9/11. Tomorrow we recognize the eighth anniversary of that event. I remember the shock, disappointment, anger, and horror I experienced that morning and over the next several days.

I also remember that although there was some very real ugliness, I felt like Americans and even the world had come together in a way that I hadn't seen in a very long time.
It is interesting to think about our "journey" over the last eight years. What have we learned from it?

I agreed I think with the majority of Americans that finding the perpetrators and ensuring that this kind of thing would never happen again was a primary objective. I am sad to find us engaged in two wars in some part directly connected to that event and feeling a little like we haven't made much progress understanding Islam or its followers and that in our desire to punish the guilty we have alienated a lot of others.

When I look at some of the angry rhetoric being exchanged over economic policy, health care, and related issues I wish we had some of that bipartisan spirit that we exhibited post 9/11 to addressing some of our current domestic issues. Don't mistake what I am saying, I am not an apologist for terrorism. I still firmly believe that those responsible for 9/11 and other terrorist incidents should be hunted down and prosecuted with a degree of finality that sends a message.

Maybe I am naive in believing that the current economic and health care situations also represent a crisis. Why can't we collaborate on solving those issues. I will admit I don't have a cogent answer.

So I guess what I will have to settle for is gratitude for the thousands of men and women in our armed forces who have served and will continue to serve to allow us to "debate" our differences. They don't get to debate policy, they just protect their country, some of them with their lives.

So amongst others I will fly my flag tomorrow in memory of those who died and those who serve. I will think back about the heroes during those immediately following days. I will also think wistfully about a nation standing together and hope it doesn't take another tragedy to unite us to that level. What will you do?